Marriage Mondays
#MarriageMondays – Jacob & Audrey Mogano
Names: Jacob and Audrey Mogano
Married since: April 2011 (Dated for 5 years before marriage)
Pet names: Love
Kids: 2 boys (Tumisho and Kamogelo)
Scripture foundation: Proverbs 18:22
How did you meet?
We met through a mutual friend (Ps Paul Moloto)
Was it love at first sight?
No
What attracted you to each other?
We were never attracted to each other at first, we started off as friends, as we spent time together we grew in love, we had common goals and enjoyed each other’s company. I was swept off my feet by his charm, he would cook for me and get the meal delivered to me at church.
Why did you get married?
It seems even before we met, we had prepared ourselves for marriage, marriage was something in our purpose, both of us saved ourselves for marriage hence it was on top of our list. We loved and enjoyed each other’s company.
How did he propose?
Jacob: I did not propose, I made it clear from the beginning that my intention was to make her my wife.
Audrey: Pedi men don’t propose, they just marry lol🤷♀
How has marriage changed you?
It has not changed us, instead it promoted our love to the next level. I love her more now than I did before marriage
What has marriage taught you?
Jacob: marriage has taught us not to be selfish and always think of each other, even when I see a nice dress in the shop, I would think of my wife and I’m no longer shy to go to the ladies section and get her something nice.
Audrey: It has taught me to appreciate the smallest things in life and to love unconditionally. I felt so blessed when my neighbor told me that they (her and her husband) noticed that my husband opens the gate for me every morning when I go to work and every evening when I come back without fail even when it is raining. (he leaves later than me and comes back home earlier)
What do you love most about being married?
Jacob: We are accountable to each other, there is no third party in our marriage.
Audrey: he appreciates and values me and does not take my opinions for granted. He spoils me, my car knows no car wash, he washes it every weekend and never allows me to travel with a dirty car. Oh….and he loves my food
What are some of the challenges you’ve faced in your marriage and how did you overcome them?
When we were faced with retrenchment, we had to do adjustments to our lifestyles, do proper planning and learn to budget better but God saw us through.
What do you mostly fight about?
Nothing serious, we fight about small things. He is a perfectionist so he likes things in order. We fight about things like me leaving my bag on the dining table or on the bed, having several pairs of shoes in the car, not putting things back where I found them etc
What irritates you about each other?
Jacob: there is no sense of urgency with my wife, she procrastinates everything.
Audrey: he blames me for everything, he is never wrong, the other day he spilled the powder soap and he said it is because I put it on the edge
How do you keep love alive?
Audrey: We love spending time together, for us lockdown is not a punishment.
.Jacob: my wife loves weddings so whenever we get an opportunity to attend a wedding in another province, we book the whole weekend away.
What do you do for fun together?
We love food so we spend time together in the kitchen (he bakes better than me) , we watch food channels and try out new recipes, we cook and invite other couples over, we go out for movies, it doesn’t really matter what we do, as long as we are together.
) , we watch food channels and try out new recipes, we cook and invite other couples over, we go out for movies, it doesn’t really matter what we do, as long as we are together.What do you think marriage is?
Marriage is a union of two people who loves each other, willing to share their goals, dreams and desires together with the aim to better each other.
What makes marriage work?
Communication, unconditional love, putting God first and making time for each other.
What make it fail?
Lack of communication, secrets, cheating and being irresponsible with money.
What do you think is the reason for people to not believe in the institution of marriage?
There are not enough role models that they can look up to.
Do you think pre-marital counselling is important, why?
It is crucial because you have to understand what you are getting yourself into, what are the expectations from both parties etc
Why do you think there is such a high rate of divorce?
Getting married for wrong reasons, having high expectations, cheating etc
What measures can be taken to break the high rate of divorce? Being faithful to each other, going for counselling if need be, communicate regularly, be honest with each other.
What do you think are the roles of husbands and wives in marriage?
The main role of husbands is to love their wives, provide for them and support them, wives need to submit to their husbands and respect them. If you are loved, submission comes naturally and if you are respected love come naturally.
What do you think is the significance of lobola?
Acknowledging that the in laws have raised your wife to the woman she is and also demonstrating to them that you will go an extra mile for their daughter.
Would you advice people to do prenup, in community of property or out of community of property ?
You first need to be honest to each other about your financial records so you can make a sound decision that will benefit both of you. We chose i community of property because we believed that as Christians, we are in this for better or worse, as we leave our parents and cling together what is his is mine and what is mine is his. This helped us to watch each other’s backs and make sound financial decisions.
What advice do you have for people intending to get married?
Audrey: make God the foundation of your marriage.
Jacob: I would first ask them this question: Are u ready to die to self? If they say yes, then they qualify to get married.
